May 31, 2018 By Nick
One thing that is absolutely sure in this life, you’re going to fail. We all do, but it’s how you respond to these testing times that will define you. They can either be stepping stones to your awesome new life or the weight around your neck that drags you down.
That part is up to you.
If you don’t fail in life, then you are just not trying hard enough and you’re doomed to a mediocre existence. The best have come up short and if you try to be everything you can be then you will too.
You will fail, it’s how you respond that counts
The only problem is with how you process the failure afterwards. It’s so easy to get stuck in a negative loop and that’s when it can eat up your confidence and take you out of the game. That is when fear of failure takes over. That will destroy you. Failure isn’t so bad, being scared of it really is.
So you need a tactic, you need a new way to process a loss.
“Success consists of stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm,” Winston Churchill.
Every failure is a gift
It’s an education, and a gift. At one point this sounded like wishful thinking to me, too, until I really accepted it as a fact. That wasn’t a light bulb moment, it was a gradual process on the way to positive thinking and a slow and steady mindset change.
One day I heard that phrase and it didn’t sound ridiculous anymore, it sounded like the right way to live. If I had to reverse engineer the whole thing, which is one of the points of this site, I’d say that if you can get to that point now, then you can shortcut a lot of the things I have to teach you.
It’s just such a powerful tool, because if you really believe, like I do now, that every problem in life is a present in disguise, then you’re unbeatable. This one simply belief means that someday, somehow, you are going to succeed. That’s just a guarantee.
Failure teaches more than success
I learned so much more from every failure than I ever did from the successes, too. The failures make you rebuild, they make you fortify the foundations rather than polish the stuff on the surface. That’s what makes the big difference.
And I think I speak from good experience. My business failure, it taught me a lot of hard lessons that I’m putting to good use now.
My BPD girl shone a light on all my weaknesses I had. She dug them up, exposed them, held them up in front of me and laughed at them.
She made me deal with issues that went back to my own childhood. She made me fix myself and she made me stronger for the girl that deserves me. She was a sparring session that got me ready for the main event.
She was a gift.
There are lessons in life everywhere
My mother’s craziness shows me how not to live. The time I spent living in a horrendous bedsit typing away on content mills on a 10-year-old laptop taught me to be humble and to bootstrap the next business.
The price of failure can be high, but it can give you so much more than it takes if you let it.
You have to look at every setback, every knockback, every blow that you take in life as a step on the ladder to success.
Famous failures, and successes
Richard Branson has failed, Muhammad Ali got his ass handed to him on several occasions, Steve Jobs got fired from his own company and you won’t find a successful entrepreneur who hasn’t crashed and burned along the way. If you want more inspirational famous failures, try these.
If you can simply plot a course to success without failing once then you’re not a person, you’re a spirit guide. Just go and buy a lottery ticket, collect your winnings and move on. You don’t need to be here.
For the rest of us, we need to fail. We need the invaluable experience it brings. Like a child that falls again and again, we need to take the knocks and the education.
“Success is normally found in a pile of mistakes,” Tim Fargo.
So embrace failure, learn from it but don’t dwell on it. Don’t let it define you. Every shitty relationship, every bad business decision and every terrible life choice will help make you a better person.
Failure plays an essential role in your success
When you finally succeed, and the laws of averages and attraction says you have to in the end, you’ll look back on those failures and know they played a vital role.
Don’t lock them away and pretend they’re not there, that is a bad way to go. Just take every mistake and every screw up for what it is. It’s a growing pain along the way.
Success is the most awesome party you’ve ever been to. Failure? It’s simply the price of admission.
So failing doesn’t mean you’re a failure. It means you had the courage to step out of your comfort zone and reach for something better. Keep reaching, take the lessons and avoid the shaky ledge next time, but keep reaching.
Seek advice, but only from actual successes
Be careful who you listen to after a failure, too, because the conservative ones who never took a risk will try and drag you back into that soft and cosy bubble. If you have given up, if you never want to challenge yourself again, if you want to consign yourself to an average life and the 9-5, listen to them.
If you’re not ready to accept that fate and you think you’ve got something more to give, then surround yourself with true successes. They’ll share their war stories, they’ll tell you about the time they ate Ramen for a month and they’ll give you the strength to go again.
Because failure is only the end if that’s what you make it. For the truly successful, it’s just a bump in the road to where we want to go.